Updates from June, 2011 Toggle Comment Threads | Keyboard Shortcuts

  • Bag of Jerky 4:03 pm on June 30, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    I stapled my finger and bled on what I think may be a very important document. Woops. ~CQH

     
  • Bag of Jerky 11:02 am on June 30, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: fried snickers,   

    I legitimately just googled “fried snickers nutrition info.”  Google must interpret the word “nutrition” lightly in this instance. ~AKH

     

    (btw, 1 fried snickers bar = 450 calories, 30 g fat, and zilcho fiber. I will eat it anyway.)

     
  • Bag of Jerky 8:58 am on June 30, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , style snaps   

    I made fun of this infomercial before.  But now that the extra belt material is dangling below the rest of my belt and I look like a hobo, will someone PLEASE get me some Style Snaps?!? ~CQH

     
  • Bag of Jerky 9:26 am on June 29, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: baseball, cliff lee,   

    On the baseball diamond, Cliff Lee is a god among mortals.  ~AKH

     
  • Bag of Jerky 9:13 am on June 29, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: food drive, pub mix   

    Yesterday, my gym set up a large receptacle in which patrons could deposit donations for a food drive.  The sign above the receptacle says “Most Needed Items:  Fruits & Vegetables, Foods High in Protein, Breakfast Foods, Pastas.”  The only kind soul to contribute thus far interpreted the sign to mean “Give Us Pub Mix.” ~AKH

     
  • Bag of Jerky 8:44 am on June 29, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: giants,   

    Yo Stretch, if you’re tall enough that you see over my head when you’re looking right in front of you, have the courtesy to tilt your head down a bit while walking so you don’t knee me in my shoulder with your freakishly high off the ground knee. I am of average height. You are NOT. ~CQH

     
  • Bag of Jerky 2:21 pm on June 28, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: CAPS LOCK   

    APPARENTLY, IT’S INTERNATIONAL CAPS LOCK DAY. ~AKH

     
  • Bag of Jerky 12:02 pm on June 28, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: body odor, rude, stench   

    Are smelly people completely oblivious to their stench?  Or do they simply not care?  I’m not referring to those who have recently physically exerted themselves.  I’m referring to the people who, everyday, regardless of temperature or activity, make me cringe to be in the same room with them. ~AKH

     
  • Bag of Jerky 11:39 am on June 28, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: asparagus, pluralization,   

    Asparagus? Asparagusses? Asparagai? Asparageese? ~CQH

     
    • Tommy 12:46 pm on June 28, 2011 Permalink | Reply

      I like asparageese.

      • Bag of Jerky 1:15 pm on June 28, 2011 Permalink | Reply

        of course you do. perhaps we’ll publish your musings about “moose.”

  • Bag of Jerky 8:53 am on June 28, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Bieber, religion,   

    This morning on my way to work I saw a couple of pamphlets on the street that said “Leave it to Bieber” and had a hand drawn picture of Justin Bieber with a halo on the front.  I don’t know if I’m more shocked that there are Bieber evangelists out there, or that I am NOT surprised at all.  If the next ground-breaking religious documentary is called “Bieber Camp”, I’m outta here. ~CQH

     
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