Updates from August, 2011 Toggle Comment Threads | Keyboard Shortcuts

  • Bag of Jerky 2:59 pm on August 31, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , fancy, poor,   

    Making dinner reservations for my very well-to-do boss at 4-5 star restaurants multiple nights a week is starting to get a little depressing. 

    ME:  “Hi David Burke Townhouse, I’d like to make a reservation for 3 people at 7pm please”

    HOSTESS:  “Certainly! We look forward to seeing  you then!”

    ME:  “You better look pretty far forward. ”


  • Bag of Jerky 1:29 pm on August 31, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: freaky eaters, mustaches, polydactylism, primordial dwarfs   

    I love my co-workers.  We are never capable of having a normal, coherent conversation at the lunch table.  Today’s topics:  freaky eaters, primordial dwarfs, polydactylism, and mustaches. ~AKH

  • Bag of Jerky 12:06 pm on August 29, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: batten down the hatches, , hurricane Irene   


    This photo was taken Saturday afternoon before Hurricane Irene hit NJ.  I guess this was Burger King’s version of battening down the hatches.  ~AKH

  • Bag of Jerky 10:43 am on August 29, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , coke, old timey advertising, questionable   

    I guess I can thank all the Coke I drank as a toddler for making me so damn popular in my pre-teen/teen years.  Thanks Coke!! ~CQH

    • EWH 1:21 pm on August 29, 2011 Permalink | Reply

      I better get started with Grant. Don’t want him to not fit in in those awkward pre-teen and teen years!. I can’t believe that this type of thing used to pass as acceptable advertising.

  • Bag of Jerky 9:50 am on August 29, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Bridezillas, ,   

    The only damage Hurricane Irene did to me is force me to watch Bridezillas for the first time. It’s not possible that there are people in the world more awful than these women. ~CQH

  • Bag of Jerky 9:39 am on August 29, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: card, mail, ,   

    In an effort to de-clutter the basement, I was throwing out a lot of my college papers.  Among them was a bag of all of the letters and cards I received while at school.  On March 17th, 2003 I received a card from my Grandmom.  It had a long note that closed with the line “I’m sending you some money to use as you please.”  Apparently, it pleased me to shove the money back into the card for safe keeping for 8 years.  At least today I’m $30 richer than I thought I was. ~AKH

  • Bag of Jerky 2:44 pm on August 26, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: milton, office space, Stapler, swingline,   

    I’m beginning to identify with Milton from Office Space.  The P.O.S. purple stapler on my desk is worthless.  Just now it was thwarted by a monstrous 5 pages.  I’m ready to invest in a Swingline® Stapler.  My current stapler’s manufacturer is so embarrassed by its quality they it took me five minutes to find the manufacturer’s stamp (I had to open the stapler to find it).  Only the best from here on out. ~AKH


  • Bag of Jerky 1:53 pm on August 26, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    This week I discovered something glorious.  Razor Sharp (aka Shop 4 Ballers) has a SECOND LOCATION!!!!  It’s merely 2 blocks from the primary Shop 4 Ballers and this second location does not appear to be a clothing store seeing as it is a relatively windowless building next to a (questionable) mechanic shop.  But there is clearly a sign with the same “Razor Sharp” lettering on the building I spotted.  Google Earth has no street view of this location, and there are constantly heads at the garage, so getting a good picture could be tricky, but I’ll do my best.  In the meantime, please enjoy the most entertaining video ever to be uploaded to the internet.  The video is on-location at everyone’s favorite Shop 4 Ballers:   ~AKH

    (Video Source:  Slayer Placemat)

  • Bag of Jerky 9:30 am on August 26, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , Irene   

    Hatches?!? We don’t need to batten hatches! Stupid hurricane… ~CQH

  • Bag of Jerky 11:44 pm on August 25, 2011 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: junior mint, Movie theater   

    One time, my mom came home from the movie theater with a Junior Mint melted to her butt. ~AKH

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